i'm scared

so we are just 30 mins shy of 5 days to go and I'm pretty scared. With having to still get through new years I really havent thought about really leaving. Now that my bags are almost fully packed with some miner set backs everything is looking great and running smoothly. hu....so I leave in 5 days. It's so hard to rap my head around it all...my life is about to change like crazy and I dont even know what to expect....so this is what it feels like to live a dream. I have always wanted to get away from this place, and now I am. I've always wanted to step out of this little box of my dutch community and close friends, and now I am. I've always wanted to travel around and meet intresting people, and now I am. I think that when you finally come to a place where your dreams are coming true, it is so hard to believe I start to think I am sleeping. Once I am up in the air and flying out of canada... then it will hit me...I had this chance to live all these dreams....and I did NOT chicken out, I am doing it.

next wednesday

So next wednesday is the BIG day! It's coming up so fast. So I only have 4 more things left on my list.
1) Pack. 2) Life group party. 3)New Years .4)Goodbye dinner Jan 2nd.

There really isn't much more to say, I am just ready to go, other then those 4 things. So till next post, merry xmas, happy new year.

the getting ready to say goodbye is the worst. I know i am going to have a great time once I get down there, but saying goodbye to everyone is going to be hard. When I said goodbye to Jenna I basically broke down. I can already picture the next goodbyes.

I'll be held together most of the night, just untill the last few are leaving. My last look at Emma is going to start the tears, and from there it will go. Goodbye Justin, goodbye to Dave, goodbye Nathan, goodbye B, goodbye Andrea, goodbye Ophie. Then my last hugs from everyone in a long time, my last embrace from Craig will open the water works. And then...the ulitmate killer, Ashley. I think I would handle her if she wouldn't cry, but I know she will. What will be my parting words. I do not know. But here I will say this when I still can. I love you guys, and I love you for understanding this. But dont hold on to me too tight, cause this is just the first goodbye of many. My life will continue to wander, but know that I will always be true to what i believe...if all I have to give is a hug to a hurting child, then my life is worth living.

check the time

wow what am i doing up so early/late you ask...well i just finished cleaning up from a sweeet party!! Amazingly the clean up was pretty good, not bad at all. The party on the other hand was insane. So many people were here i hadnt seen in ages! to see everyone again all together was some good times. Well now that my party is over I can really get ready for my trip. 11 days to go now! WOW!! well talk to you all soon...hope to see you befor I leave.

In denial

I dont know why is hasnt it me yet. Maybe it's because of the christmas season and everyone is hyped up on that. Today is exactly 2 weeks untill I leave....like seriously! that is BIG...why hasnt it hit me yet? I thought at this point it would. So here is the run down of my first couple weeks in Gautemala.

Our first couple weeks there are gonna be a big change from my life now. We start with orientation, not only do we have to get to know eachother, we have a whole city to get to know. We visit the market the first day to see the culture up close and then we head back to the college. We get pushed right into our classes starting with a week of intense Spanish classes...como? During the first 2 weeks we also visit different churches in the area. On about the 3 week we move into a Guatemalan home, near our school. Then for that week we walk back an forth to school and live completley in the culture of Guatemala. Wow, what a busy 3 weeks. The end of January consists of "missionary boot camp" which I do not like the sound of..just kiding. Then we get our first break and drive to the Pacific Coast, where we surf and do all that fun stuff. This is gonna be an amazing trip.

what i look like now

well since I'm guessing I may look a lot differnent when i get back from Guatemala I would remind you now what I look like, and then repost the picture with my updated version aways into my trip...so enjoy..,

Its a matter of hour till the tears begin

So I thought I was gonna get through this whole thing with little tears, but saturday served me wrong. On saturday night at the VCC boys hockey game I said goodbye to Jenna as I wont see her for 6 months. Well I was doing ok, untill I had to let go of her. Man I was such a reck. It felt good to know that I am really gonna miss this place and all the people. I started thinking last week if I am really gonna want to come back, but I know I will. Everyone here is just so great to me. Cant wait to see you all on friday night 7:30 my house!! all invited be there.

Lists

As I see my friends are enjoying writing xmas lists ie. Lists of what they will be doing during the "Xmas Break" I will make my own list... *=finished
*1) BOB
*2) Finish Work
*3) Family Xmas
*4) LOTS of xmas parties (Including mine the 23)
5) Church services galore!! mygoodness...oh it's gonna be sweet
6) Boxing day with Ashley!! cant wait
7) Photo shoots
8) New Years (no idea what I'm doing yet)
9) Last Goodbye...oh so SAD
10) Hello Guatemala..oh so HAPPY!

Thank GOD!!

Well today is the first day of my last week at work. So totally I can finally day "this is my last wednesday here!!" Wow what a great blessing. Now all I ask is that the 2 weeks after that slow down like crazy, cause I know they will just fly past. It's gonna be weird saying goodbye to this home I've loved for the past 16 years. But I know I'll love my home down there too. It's finally hitting me that I'm leaving, kinda. Well the party is gonna so fun. I hear lots of people are coming, the more the better...so invite all the fvc crew over, it's gonna be so great to see everyone again. Well till then ttyl.

Another week down

Well I got another week completed and it really hasn't sunk in yet. You think all of this count down and such would make me get excited...but I'm not yet. It's gonne take till a week befor and I start packing...lol. Well 2 weeks to my going away party/fvc gathering...you better be there!

past the big "30" mark

well 29 days to go. wow it is sure coming up fast. I still have 2 weeks of work left which I pray will just fly by, as I kinda hate work, and after that it's smooth sailing all the way to January 4th. So lets take alittle look at the old schedual:

December 9 - The Gap @ PA -DONE-
December 11 - Kids Xmas Production (gonna be hilarious) -DONE-
December 16 - Battle of the Bands (featuring my two fav bands Proximity Se7en and Gideons Hill)...both hot bands by the way..had to give you guys some credit. -DONE-
December 18 - Open presents day! (yea my family is weird all early and all) -DONE-
December 20- Last day of work!! woohoo! -DONE-
Decemeber 23 - Party/Get together of great friends! @ 7:30 be there! -DONE-
December 25 - XMAS
Decemeber 31 - NEW YEARS!! woohoo (still dont know what I'm doing, any ideas?)
January 2 - Dinner of all close friends to say good bye
January 3 - Last day home (pic up ange from ferry, my fellow guatemala goer)
January 4 - 8:05am my plane leaves....Cya

December

I think this is by far te best "winter weather" BC has ever had. It didn end up being one of those snow for one day and then rain and it all goes away. Its been here for 4 days now and its so nice. Snow on every lawn, the roads are great and I now love BC winters. Well on to another point. It is just over one month untill I leave. Its getting kinda scary. I really want to go now, since my life here is really annoying. My parents are getting all weird and I really hate my job. But then again I do so much at the church and christmas is coming, if I left now I would mess a lot up. Well...I only have to hold on for 4 more weeks and I'm set. Also party is still on....so yea, let me know if you are coming.